Sunday, July 5, 2020

Silly

It's okay to be silly all your life, especially if it's time to retire, and people can be watching.

To Surround

They are surrounding her in a sensitive, suggestive, sensual manner.

Overly Eager for What Reasons?

There are always ladies older than the older lady I like who are willing to get her where she's vulnerable and ward me off and sever our ties.

Let's not overstate the obvious.

The older lady I like followed along with other people.

What is she doing?

For being crazy to teach people lessons, the older lady I like sure is having fun.

Message Board Post by Me

(film|boards)

Not sure if it'd interest someone like you coming from me, but I wonder if Ellen would rank well against those ladies. It all boils down to her skills in morality, in the end, how do things end up with her? Sure, she might be more exposed, though, but what did she do with that exposure? How does it rank against others of the creme of the crop? I desperately want to be compared with my equals, not sure why she wouldn't. Does some people want to be compared to people with opposing values that clash? No one's that bad, but with criminals out there they can be pretty crazy I guess.

Attractive Adults?

Why do attractive parents still have custody over their children, at least in spirit, if not also in physical form?

I never really had a chance.

One thought off and it's done, if anything were really off thought.

Making the Mark

Having kids is a big deal to some people.  For some, it's just a job and eventually just retirement.

"Don't all go at once, now?"

Do colleges care if their students not only go abroad but want to live in Europe, like Germany, for instance-

Contemplating / Perplexed

So, if the older lady isn't a big part of my life, it seems as though some resentment is still harboured and leaves me wondering.

Something in Common

Famous Baby Boomer men like ranging from Andrew Lloyd Webber to Tim Burton, have a common thread.

Confused

I hope I didn't arouse my dad, he seemed self-absorbed as usual, though, unless I talk to him or he says something to me first.  He's sick with a terminal illness.

Message Board Post by Me


I figured it out, some people try to make themselves seem smarter by…

…skipping the easy part and spending more time on the extra things, showing they've already mastered the basics that you need to know to say what they say. They did it at school, too, a lot at my Baptist college online. They didn't really seem to have good fundamentals, though. It was probably racist propaganda.

Dark Races

People like dark blacks but not dark Asians as much?

Byyyyye

Maybe, I should try to just go to bed for a long time again.

Not Good

They need to stop making me accountable for "getting" to be monitored in private.

"The Saying Goes"

People keep saying I'm not legit.

My Rights

So, the older lady I like has a thing where it's like she really is going in to tell me I'm nothing and says I'm just like my parents when I'm not!

A Problem

Some people keep acting like I have a problem.

Let Be

I'm left with problems with my dad.

Think about it.

Late Boomers are fake that they are strict to kids.

Mean

Baby Boomers don't understand instant gratification because they didn't have computers as kids.

What if...

What if I told you you infatuation with Pirates of the Caribbean 1 was superficial?  I forget why I thought that but did.  You seem to have taken it for granted.  It's a good movie.  What's so better about other movies, anyway?

Trapped

Why do people keep setting up a trap for me?

Impassible

One thing goes wrong and the problems don't stop.

Hiding From Hollywood

Are people hiding from Hollywood for good reasons or bad reasons?

Trouble

I'm in trouble because people were secretly hurting me and the police wouldn't believe me so I tried to tell them or tell them telepathically how they were attacking me.

Mean to All

Should I be mean to everyone because they use me if I feel relaxed like they're nice to me?
I'm not up for this kind of rhythm and vibe, with the rules that mean nothing and single me out, what I can think, how I can react to people.

Taking the Some Prominent People of the Creme of the Crop of My Relationships

It seems the people I meet the older lady I like has fun with but it ruins our relationship in ways that I bet are on purpose also because people said I was in trouble, so that was the determining factor, which I didn't do anything that bad.

Website Update

I updated this page with 3 entries, the 1st having been there already.


Attractive Musical Family (2015 or 2016?)
I watched a musical and saw there was an attractive floutist in the orchestra pit.  I think they are local musicians, but I am not sure.  Anyway, she had short red hair and was fairly thin and medium-tall.  As I was waiting at the backstage door, I saw her come out I think.  Her husband was barely taller, with probably fair balding hair, slumped over, one of those young professor looks, probably a beard and moustache, but I saw him from the back and maybe not the front.  Anyway, the daughter was a little shorter with smooth wavy white hair, probably natural.  She was cute, kinda thin but supple, you may get the picture.  This may have been like 2015 or 2016 in Orlando, Florida, US.
Mother Who Looked About Just Like Someone Else (2016-2017?)
She had short gray hair and an upturned sorta snoot nose but in a good way.  Her husband was taller and obese.  She had several daughters I think, and the youngest was sweet and tried to say how the night was special it seemed to me.  I was at a concert of the organ here in Orlando, Florida, USA.
A Polish Lady Who Looked Just Like Someone Else, the Same Lady as the Last Entry (DVD)
I borrowed a DVD from the library, and there were 3 on racism, all of which I did watched.  It turned out to be mostly about Black people.  They showed black and white video footage of people in the US being segregated.  They showed Polish people, and first I saw one of them looked like a Polish violin teacher I had born around 1961 or 1962.  She had bleached hair some below her shoulders and bangs.  The lady in the video looked mad.  Then, I saw one who looked like the lady the last one looked like but in a different way, almost the same, too.  She had short gray hair and looked dressed up well for a woman.  She looked full of good things, and it seemed people took advantage of the opportunity and didn't really bother with her, despite how attractive she was.  She was Polish.  The lady I'm talking about that looks alike is German.
Attractive Mom at the Grocery Store With Her Kid Daughter (July 5, 2020)
The woman was not too short but somewhat tall, thin but well built, looked emotionally responsive, and had short mousy maybe brown gray hair, a little textured and wavy.  The daughter was maybe around 9 years old with a dress on that covered her figure, and this was Sunday afternoon so maybe church.  She had slightly wavy mousy brown hair.  She was a little obese and looked different from her mom.  I was happy and responsive and nice to walk by, thinking reminds me of being fatter than my own mom, but I figured she wouldn't like it because my mom was pretty much a staunch former athlete/dancer and there was not much of her mom's kind of emotion going on and not so much in the clear in ways often.

Well?

An older lady I like seems to be shimmying saying she talks to anyone but really moves up.

Also, I keep getting told I don't deserve it.

Too Sad

Someone died from a car during a Black protest.  They should really sign on online and try to protest that way.

Why I'm Not in Church

Instead of having a private experience, they're just slowly picking at me for why I'm not more well-rested.

Fine

My personal life was fine before for whatever reason I was called to the counselor's office.

Where did all the magic and love go for Generation X?

It's those kids from the late 1970s and early 1980s I bet.

On Top

I feel like I'm on top when it comes to other singers, so not much happening.

Bad Racists

I bet some bad people out there are comfortable being racist to me automatically but like I did something because it's protocol.

No.

I feel people are trying to dominate me.

Others Joining Choirs, Me Joining the Orchestra

Why can't I seem to learn new things?  Am I in talent menopause?

"No Hard Feelings"

I feel I'm being told I don't want to have fun.

The Past and Promises

If I expect the worst, it's because of the past and promises.

Saturday, July 4, 2020

Sin

So, there is nothing for bad people to do, so just pitch them against me?

Bothered

People keep thinking I'm bad for not letting them get away with not stopping bullying me.

Smartness

I might be smarter if I moved back to Southeastern Florida.

Jalapeno Poppers!

I'm making frozen TGIF jalapeno poppers!

JULY 4TH!

It's almost time to go out and see the fireworks!

...Was

Was classical music at a peak in the late 1990s and early 2000s?

"This is fine."

Why do people keep leaving me out!  Ever since Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) came out, I had problems...

So what if I seem to make a mistake?  I'm left out in the cold!  Something bad is bound to happen.  No one cares.

If you wonder what I think...

...I think they are bad.  Is that enough, or are you just asking me to curse about them?

People are people.

The world is holding back it thinks against me like I should care anymore...

I need some plans and goals.

Perhaps, some things don't change?

Accused

So, what, some people don't matter at all to anyone anymore because they think I did something bad when I'm usually good?

Recently New BlogSpots & Twitter

BlogSpot

Hamster


Twitter

Unfair

It's not right how no one really talks to me because they think I messed up my life.

Speaking out Against Talking About Racism

It's funny when white people speak out somehow/secretly against someone who is not all White making valid points about racism.

I don't...

...think you're mature enough to talk about this.

I think you're wrong.

When I spammed my friends, I was lonely and they didn't write me back that quickly and not after I e-mailed them again ... and it was advice they seemed to beg for.  The environment I was in was confusing, the people outside the apartment we had to move to because of Hurricane Katrina in 2005, but this was 2007.  Yes, I spammed them for months, but I said I was sorry for it in the messages and they didn't do anything.  They are free to just block me without saying anything first, and one did.  Anyway, it's none of your business, right?  You're just wasting your life, anyway.

July 4th

Happy July 4th!

Rigged

I notice a strange pattern left with me.

I am fine.

Not That, Especially Simple

It might be easy to understand a lot of confusing writing with me, but that's a good thing!

I may seem spritely, and you just associate that as being like a child.  I am free to develop how I want.

Friday, July 3, 2020

The Whole World!

Boy, I sure made a joke of the bad ones of people in Hollywood.

Problems ... Problems

Why wait for a problem to solve another?

Message Board Post by Me

(film|boards)

Topic by Me, Continued From Last Post

People who fight for black rights just hate police because they look German-American. They think they are racist.

Message Board Post by Me

(flim|boards)

Topic by Me

What do you think of the people fighting for how Blacks are treated?

I don't think they really care and are really racist. They just feel sick that the police act mean often more to Black people because the police are mean to them, too. Most police look German-American, and, since most Americans are not that German-American it seems, they resent the racist police who look German-American and attractive because they don't tend to be social to them, they think. They feel like the victim of racism, and most of them are not German-American or Scandinavian. I think another clue is that they don't fight for the rights of people who are half White half Asian, and within Eurasians there is racism for who's from Europe and who doesn't know if they're Native American indian, as genealogy tests have unknown sections and change the results sometimes.

"Be Prepared!"

Instead of being impressed, people tear me down.

"Everything's Alright"

You should cool off and unwind and not meddle in non-White races.

People Who Are Nice to Asians

So, what, I'm bad if I like Asian things too but "White" things just as much?

Sloppy

I get problems and am left to deal with them like they won't go away.

Friends and Family are Foe

Some people I am related to or was friends with can't get on a good rapport so life can be worth it.

"Okay, I'm okay, now."

People ruin the world and say it's okay to come out now because they've ruined everyone else's lives to catch up.

Judas

Some people I'm related to seem to think money is evil in any form or cause.

Joke

People don't know who I was all growing up.

People I'm related to think they know the real me because I'm 1/2 Asian and they simply knew me since I was born or when they were older enough to remember for if some are younger... not that I'm "half bad."  They just know they knew me and have a preset disposition of racism towards me.

Taunting

People keep taunting me that I can't have anything they don't have, simply.

Traitors

An older lady I like keeps being made to be seen as better than me and others, and they use it against me now.

Accusational

I feel some people chose to accuse me if something can be seen as either ordinary or out of the ordinary that I do, that technically did not have an assignment but left me wondering.

Found Out

If some people are racist in general, why get into that situation?  It's not okay.

Everyone's on the lose, now school's over.

My generation is in high places, we just don't see them on the big screen.

Wait 'til I die.

Would people be more social if something bad happened to me where I could not enjoy life?

Slightly Racist Obese Ladies

Those obese ladies seem onto me, wanting to act suggestive or iffy.

No one has to talk to me, no one has to talk to you.

I grew up normal and well-accepted, and now people are acting iffy about me, like I'm different.

"Crazy" People

People today went crazy over jealousy of me and wanting in on classical music and musical theater, and the social scene is unsafe.  They don't seem nice to me, some.

Lost Chance

I was better off how my environment was in the past.

In Trouble for "Stupid" Reasons

I think things messed up when people didn't get that an older lady I like isn't some weirdo attacking me through them like they swear, and if I get upset I don't really mean it against her but still wound up in trouble for stupid reasons.

Thursday, July 2, 2020

Your Nose

Do people from cold climates have pointy noses?

...And "What's So Good About THAT?"

What's so interesting about anyone if it's about their own family, and you can never get as close?

Wildly Suffering Since 2005

People are making sure I suffer racially since my generation left the house.

Racist Development

Did some people develop to get onto me racially?

Something ... New?

So, default, cold countries are off limits?

Give and Take in Some Situations

A full Asian cannot guarantee marriage to a Caucasian, but I can.  However, a German might like an attractive Japanese or even Chinese over me.

Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Good Kids?

People like to secretly/telepathically indicate to successful part Asians that even if you're good there's more and that's that we're not liked and shouldn't expect to pursue happiness.  It's like you're in trouble to try to be happy with things in life and doing things that are okay to make it like that.

Seeing If They Can "Rat Me Out"

I grew up well-behaved and did well in school and was nice to other people.  Other parents wanted to take me home, and the teachers wish everyone were me.

Now, why are some people trying to say there's a way to "rat me out" and as worse than the rest?

Betrayal

What do you think of people who worship you strangely only to stop and betray you, frequently happening?

Tuesday, June 30, 2020

Bothered

People know what I think in private because there are people monitoring me in private who somehow magically get the message across.  No one comments on my blog, though.  So, they go for what's most important and chose to mess around.  They linger on it, for years, forever maybe.  What about all the other good people?  They must have productive lives.  I somehow lose spirit and wonder if people are pretending I'm good because I'm part Chinese.

A smart question does not ask for a stupid answer.

"Children of the 90s"

In the early/mid 1990s, why did children appear not to know what was going on around them?

"Be Prepared"

So, let me get this straight.  You weren't really doing homework, anyway, so you grew up with chores to get you ready for independence gradually starting at 16 until 18.  So, everyone is a maid and has no brain?

Schools gave busywork and wasted the day talking to bad people and making us do busywork.  We never learned much.  We were told to go to boarding school as a teen if we wanted a shot at intelligence.  I wanted to do music.

Baby Boomers had a feast every day, and so they still have energy, while their kids's generation didn't get to eat as much and are small and underfed, encouraged to diet, short and fat arranged in funny ways.

Puberty

Were children of the early/mid 1990s pubescent?

Monday, June 29, 2020

Not Before

People believe I am constantly an issue.  What a change from yesterday!

The Special Kids

Are some people nicer and more lenient with their kids than other people?

Elderly Men

Elderly men are mistaken to think I am not still good.

Sunday, June 28, 2020

A Popular Way to Wear Hair

Girls tie a ponytail with a bump with the hair pulled half through.  That went outta style a long time ago maybe seemingly quickly, at least to some. Instead, they do that but upside down, a long time ago.  I wonder what they do, now.  I'm not 100% sure.

New Decision and Can't Go Back

I used to be considered a good, upstanding person, but something went screwy and just sorta ask someone from a cold country in Europe and they're mostly sorta shrug like it's questionable.

Superiority

The world is teaching Whites from Generation XYZ to respond to the fact they are superior to me.

Better

People used to say, despite what they did, it is better to like old fashioned things and prestigious people, but now the world is nothing.

Everyone acts like I'm bad and not to be a part of this life like everyone else.

Saturday, June 27, 2020

Message Board Post by Me


Topic by Me

The Spanish 100s of Years Ago From Spain Are Not Like Latinos

They seem white, and Southern Europe is European, too.

Anyone Want That Seat Over There

Funny, people don't care about classical orchestral instrumental musicians the way the musicians themselves don't care about lead violinists.

Care and Concern

People pretend to care about me but are just being mean.

Unfair

People are allowed to attack me, but I can't defend myself.

Other people...

Other people don't get in trouble for thinking bad of me like the word "nigger" not being tapped into...

Classical Orchestral Instrumental Musicians Since Childhood

Don't tell a classically trained musician you love Beethoven's 9th Symphony, for example, because, I mean, don't expect a favorable reaction ... most normal places they are highly egotistical against people like me who can't play well enough/yet to be in an orchestra.

"Tested?"

People love singling other people out, like me or people I care about in weird ways.  Not everyone gets tested.

At Risk

Californians want to be a part of the US more, but they want to attack vulnerable people like me who happen to have ancestors from Pennsylvania.  There are others, of course, with ancestors from Pennsylvania and some in or from California.

Who's "bad," anyway?...

Why do bad people get stimulated more and the world revolve around them in ways they enjoy?

Also, I'm not bad just because other people are really good, like an explanation for who it was that caused a problem maybe no one even did or maybe someone else, like an adult figure or older person.

In Disagreement

If someone disagrees and is nice to you now will be mean later.

Who says? that I'm not as good? and that people can do that to me and like I'm that kind of person?

Also, some people say they are all that to others and then you find they're just stealing attention and are like the baby and stimulated etc.

Being Good

People used to know me as good.  It just seems to slip conveniently that I don't matter as a person in general.

Message Board Post by Me


Topic by Me 

Re: What are some things you can do therapeutically?

How about play music with others in a classical orchestra rather than just at home whatever you can do?

I'm not heading for the end.

People from Generation X who had kids barged in and knocked the kids out with parents who were in their 30s and 40s at the time and said their kids can do anything and replace me because they, the kids, are from a younger generation.

I think, in classical music, kids think it's something special for them but think it is tacky to be expressive, like it's something new and they get to decide.  It probably happens late at night when people are sleeping and floats around in the day in the subconscious.

You might try comparing kids today to generations between me and them, rather than just older ones like Generation X.

90's/00s' - Still Normal...

So, the 90's/00's theme was classical orchestral musical instrumentalists, as included, still going out and having fun like a teenager but feeling special.

Orchestra

Musicians are healthy musically from the therapy of being in the orchestra.  They probably don't spend much of their practicing alone, like you do growing up playing a classical orchestral instrument.

Subconscious Tension From Different Countries About Germany

There is a lot of tension for people who are not German or not all/mostly German in liking Germany maybe especially.

Germans just feel mean to others that they have the most to show for.

Young Musicians Playing Classical Music in Berlin

In 2019, the European Union Youth Orchestra played Beethoven's 9th Symphony in Berlin.  They even had a video of them playing live in the streets.  Wow!  They must have worked hard.

So, what about the local musicians of Berlin or other smaller cities in Germany?

Abuse - Relative Age

People seem to baby and favor the youngest child, no matter what the other children do.

Friday, June 26, 2020

German Comradery

Germans are very "close knit" and tend to stick together, probably only opening up when something's in it for them.  They aren't always open to part-German Americans.  It might depend on the rest of their "mix."

Finding Out

Sometimes, Germany and some surrounding countries seem open to the US so much, but I find they are living problems of the past still, now.

How do you decide what's right - hight?

If you were short, would you make fun of short people, say a girl who is 5'3"?

Message Board Post by Me

This is what's really going on with Disney, not necessarily to do with corona…

Downtown Disney became Disney Springs.

Splash Mountain will be replaced with The Princess and the Frog (2009,) supposedly because of racism in the background of Splash Mountain. The Princess and the Frog (2009) is a favorite of mine because it takes place in New Orleans, where I lived as a teenager, an added benefit?

Frozen (2013) seems to be stagnant, as well as one more hit made today. Not many new ideas for princesses, besides Tangled (2010,) which left a lasting mark, and Brave (2012.) These movies resemble 2 friends I had who I don't think I have much of a relationship with anymore..

"A Broken Record"

Sometimes, negativity can be like "a broken record."

Unusual Things - Not Better

Traditionally, things like ballet and classical music are well-liked, but if someone does something odd, hard to do, and not really as appealing does not mean those other things go to waste.

Young Adults Today - How They Are...

Young adults today are overly religious.

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Is this some joke?

What about people who cannot sing at all?

Message Board Post by Me

Who is better: good singers or instrumentalists?

Sometimes, it happens both ways, but instrumentalists in general tend not to admit the piano is worth shit. Take it from a former piano major at a prestigious institution, yours truly.

In Trouble

What do you think about being in trouble for wanting to play music and being good at ballet because you already did but not really ready to be a professional...? in trouble because people think ballet isn't as good as it seems, like it's worse than other things.

You know, a lot of people who play classical music exceed the talent of ballet but play because they were too wayward or absent-minded to be more of a performer as a person or blend in with others in a good aspect...?

Of course, many people join orchestra in school because they have nothing to do, and I wanted to play for a long time.

"That's the facts, Max."

So,  Generation X is always in trouble.

What is their problem?

I can't trust people who are old enough to be my parents because they always think I'm in trouble, and I find out sooner or later.  I had perfect behavior almost all in school all my life.

What are we waiting for?...

What do you think about giving people my age more time to put themselves out there and show their face, again?

Too Big?

Famous Late Baby Boomer English women I like seem to dislike me, like I'm a monster!? but I'm young enough to be their daughter and they are older than my mom.  How perverted is that to think I'm big when I'm much much younger?

Why did I stop growing?  Now, I am short and fat.

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Public or Private?

Do you need to see people?

1

People think I'm a number to eliminate and then see what they get.

Tuesday, June 23, 2020

Strict on Me for Shit Reasons

People think I'm bad not to be a robot! but think it's okay if they are bad in tricky ways. 

You made a big decision you can't seem to take back...

If people make fun of me for being excited about culture ... you know I know no trivia ... that's a lot of knowledge of trivia of entertainment other people know to put behind, the way people were embarrassed for liking Pirates of the Caribbean and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005.)

Tired

I'm tired of being tired.

"Sooner or Later"

We set goals that are becoming more unattainable, but it may be the simple things in life we ignored, like physical activity and art therapy type things.

"All By Myself"

If people only act unappealing around me gives me reason to believe what if they really were and no one was appealing to me? I'd be really lonely.

What is "Writing Too Much"

When you've made your point and keep going to cover the fact you have no more points left, as of now.

Do you write too much?

Well, stop!

Being an Exceptional Individual, From a Certain Generation

Just because someone is a Late Baby Boomer and a very good, impressive, loving, capable person does not mean you need to put them in "sin..." and take away their "babies" or younger friends.

You might find if that's what you do you cannot really provide...! for them, due to stress from outside factors or that you set highly unrealistic goals and strange fantasies without the ability to carry out a successful plan to honor and "sex" them.  I have a situation like this and see no results in the goal but see maybe an excuse that maybe if they didn't do it by now they will later; then, you'd say, "These things take time," though that's not always so and you're uninterested to find out.  So, no offense to anyone like this.  I'm not sure what craziness brought this on in this way.  All I can see is I was stopped from being happy, known or unknown.

Monday, June 22, 2020

Messing Up

People like to make it hard on good people so they mess up by accident and then no one likes them.

Mixed Race

People get ahead of mixed race people because they get more holistic and active experience, even affecting them physically, of socializing.

People don't get as close to mixed whites.

Abstraction of Focus

When people reach for abstract things from longer ago and say it's better, do they just mean things like the 1980s? which you can put a label on?  Sure, there were better things before, too, "who knows" when they started.

I figured this out. "Cool it."

The exploitation part of the fame of the older lady I like is just a precautionary measure like handling the coronavirus/COVID-19.

F.Y.I. (For Your Information)

Protocol, it's safe to assume I'm in trouble.  Don't let the suggestion of me give you a hard day.

More Subconscious Thoughts Floating Around After Dark

Are you generation-prejudice in your sleep?

Sunday, June 21, 2020

Drawings/Colorings for the Day


video lessons




Hamster

My hamster got out of its cage, apparently I left a door opened.

Saturday, June 20, 2020

Hamster

This hamster girl loves the external wheel, going in and out sometimes, running in it.

Hamster

I just got a hamster, and it came out when I played the violin near me on a wheel.

Does this mean...

Is it just me, or, because an older lady I like was exploited, does that mean people need and expect more of her than if she wasn't?

She was sort of advertised that way.  It seems not to be in the best ways possible.

"I wasn't made to..."

I am not made to satisfy other people's stupors, like wondering why I don't deserve to be hurt for some reason.  I was alert before, and I am still here now; it's not like you suddenly dominated me and satisfied me sexually.

"Ready as Ever"

I'm ready to do stuff, and no one else is, and I get the blame.

Friday, June 19, 2020

Me Singing Now

Weird

It's funny how people aren't afraid to be mean to me.

Reality

Do you see reality as how things are as opposed to how they should be?

"Taking Advances"

It seems some adult public figures or celebrities would treat me differently if I were still in grade school.  They seem to be forward with my generation.  Before, they would be taking a risk to make advances, which some did.

When Is Cool "Too Cool?"

I was counting on being cool in school.

Catching up on Sleep or Tired on Pills Now

I just slept a lot, over 24 hours, eating in between, and feel much better to be awake.

Cursed to Never Feel Special

When I ask about something philosophical and emotional, it's not like someone popular and "naughty" finally decided to say something good.  It's just boring, old Christina, who some people have known since birth but never talked to her as much as others.

Thursday, June 18, 2020

Exercise

Just jogging isn't enough for me because it wears my legs out.

Fame

Can fame change adventures?

Wednesday, June 17, 2020

Germans and Asians

Are Germans more Japanese than the Chinese?

"Passing Judgment" - Home Life

How can people be nasty to me for my home life just being different or mad if I'm ahead but like others like that?

Subconsciousness - Generations

People just assume I'm in the wrong because of my generation and my dad's generation.

Misery

Everyone is just sitting there doing nothing like I'm not good enough.

Wedding Music

I just got a wedding book for violin.  I watched a video of a boy who knew and knows the girl who wrote it.  It does look very good and clean-cut.  I know almost every song in it.

A Strange Phenomenon

Did you ever think after you've come all this way, you can't feel any sense of wonder over anything ... and feel like people have been trying to hypnotize you into worrying that you're not perfect and don't win?

Oxymoron - Stimulation of Different Generations

Why would a Late Baby Boomer act reprimandingly to Generation X that they themselves need more stimulation?  The problem Generation X has is not getting stimulated like Late Baby Boomers.

Popular Cultures

It seems popular to be German and immerse in Florida or Japan.

Mystery of Music

Classical orchestral musicians seem to think poorly of pianists and avoid giving them attention at all costs and averting any and all acknowledgement.

Organists seem to laugh at all other musical instruments.

Race - Excitement

The Asian culture is actually very exciting, to follow.





Tuesday, June 16, 2020

Facebook - Desolate

Facebook seems like a win or lose deal.  It's always there if you need it, though.

Popular Misconception and False Guise

It's not a sin to be interested in other races and also whatever the one you practice is.  Some of us just haven't been "tested" or "overrated" in this.  There's a fine line between acting human and worrying about how you appear racially and not "cutting it."

Racistic Mystery

Say, some people are very racist and nice to smart people. They are not nice to me if I'm smart because of my race. They are also popular with many others who seem to just get along with it being that way. In the end, these people will be glorified by those in high places or it will feel that's how it is. In the end, you don't know what happened and why you have no one to talk to.

"Making Changes"

It seems Early Boom parents had kids born in the mid-1980s ... their kids felt like people thought they were each the best one in the world, but now Early Boomers are coming, plowing through their lives reprimanding them that they are not that good at all and can only get close to their parents.

Some parents push their kids hard to be the best, being mean to them if they are not.  That is how they treat some people like people born around 1990 because they are embarrassed of how their kids born then turned out, in the world.

Femininity

Females may resemble their dad but are always growing more feminine, perhaps.

Too Tired to Learn Something New?

Do people get tired of learning new things as they grow older, take, violin, diving...? but maybe piano for fun is okay?

The Art of the Self

Classical musicians seem most confident they will prevail.

Fractured Logic

It's interesting when someone who is very good compared to others all the time pretty much ... if they get in a bad situation and for once are in the wrong ... what that opens up to other people who are not as good when the good person loses it? like it means these other people were really better.

Monday, June 15, 2020

A Terrible Trend

Sadly, it seems like the Black culture in the United States of America started the habit to act delirious and try to distract/divert you from thinking about the good things in life, like how much love there was before the internet and cell phones ... or about your parents or those you love.

I also noticed they especially like the "adrenaline rush" of getting closer to people during the coronavirus/COVID-19.  I know they "just want something to happen."  They feel lost and want others to feel that, too.

Racist Vibes, Inevitable?

Can it ever really be trusted to leave a non-European race person to others, especially of other races/ethnicities, and not suffer racist vibes?  Of course, different mixes and different races and different personalities get racist vibes in different ways.

So, you can.

People already know Late Generation X suffered socially.  People are actively chosing to disregard the quality of their involvement.

You thought Late Generation X was assured to always be loved if they looked like children or teenagers, but apparently people can stop loving them in light of how young they look still.  It's strange because Late Boomers still get support, though they feel more stimulated than most people, in a young way.

Sunday, June 14, 2020

Everyone wants the same thing.

It's hard to talk about social problems and to start eradicating them because everyone will claim to be better than you because they claim they must all have the same problem, at least within certain demographics.  That's my experience.

"Black Lives Matter"

Why did people originally start to whine about racial issues when they gave up on life, as an excuse?  I mean it might have been in the 2010s, though something was brewing in the 2000s.  There was a clear escalation around 2003/2004.  2005 is when it seemed to really hit.